Marriage and Children

     This week in class we learned about transitioning into marriage and having children. Having children is such a blessing, isn't it? Well, as much as a blessing as it is, it may also be a challenge to the marriage if a couple doesn't understand the changes their relationship will go through. Often the new mother spends more time focusing on the baby and less time on her husband. She thinks he can take care of himself while the baby NEEDS her. Well, her husband NEEDS his wife! When going through this change from husband and wife to mother and father the man will often feel neglected or unappreciated.
     So what kind of changes are we talking about here. well, less sleep is one, which might have a big effect on your reaction to the other changes. Another change is the amount of workload. women's workload will increase by 67% while a mans increases by 37%. This change is due to the women's primary responsibility of taking care of the baby. Sometimes this will cause resentment between husband and wife. Another difference is the amount of agreement between them. Men perceive that they agree on things less, while in actuality they agree more! It might be because women no longer voice their agreement with everything but more often will voice their disagreement.
     What can we do then to make this transition easier? Include the husband in all things BABY!! Allow him the opportunity to connect with the baby prenatal as well as after birth too. You can also read parenting books together. Involve the husband in all the changes the wife has to make in her diet and exercising too. During these changes both parents need to remember to take care of themselves as well. Ultimately, it is most important to talk about these changes that are going to happen before they happen. Make a plan!
   The most important thing we talked about in class is that even though these changes and problems may be natural, they don't have to happen! If we are aware of the problems we can make plans to prevent them from happening. Having a family is one of the greatest gifts God has given us. And our families are forever!