Stressors in the Family

     So its been a while.Yikes! But no worries! I still plan on discussing EVERYTHING I have learned from this class in the past few weeks. A few weeks ago we discussed how the family copes with crisis, basically how the family functions when under stress. A theory that was talked about was ABCX theory. This theory explains how the each member of the family can have a different experience while going through the same event or stressor. "A" stands for the actual event so the death or the loss of a job. "B" is the behavioral response. Its an observable response of the person plus the consequences of those responses. What the person is thinking is cognition which is "C" in this model. All these together is the "X" of the experience of the individual. So even though family members may be experiencing the same event their behaviors and thoughts can be very different creating a very individualized experience.
    Because each person is having a different experience it is important to understand that their coping strategy may also be different. Men and women cope in different ways also. We have to understand that there is more than one right way to cope with crisis. We should not criticize others for coping differently than ourselves. But a great way to decrease the variable of difference in experience is to talk about the crisis as a family. The more the family shares their feelings and thoughts the more they ARE having the same experience and thus can cope better together!
     A coping strategy that fosters personal growth after a crisis is reframing. Reframing is when you are able to take the event and see it in a new way, a more positive way. Imagine the event as a picture. You can put the framing around several parts of the picture. Depending on where you put the frame is what picture you will see. Reframing is putting that frame around a more positive picture from the whole event. It can also entail taking more in, understanding more than just your perspective of the event. Or even "zooming in" to understand more of the "why" in the event.
     There are countless examples of stressors or crisis that the family faces. These stressor are not always negative but can be positive like getting a new job. Whether positive or negative it creates a need for family members to shift their actions and maybe their roles in the family. The importance for family members to communicated their experience when going through hardships is great. The family can be your greatest support system if you allow it! Its important to allow the family to be strengthen by adversity rather than fall apart. I know the strength of our families can be a blessing because a family is forever!